Wednesday, July 2, 2008

The Hidden Perfectionist

Post 24:

So, I went to the ER yesterday due to me screwing up my knee. Thats right, I got injured playing ultimate...

Also, check out my newest blog, it has images I created using Terragen (will update it randomly)

There is an amazing program that exists on the Internet. It is a program that allows you to create your own terrain, and in its later form, it allows you to populate it with plants and animals. I am, of course, talking about terragen. This program is so advanced that it has been used to make the scenery in Beyond the Limits and Stealth (movies) and several video games.

Terragen is an amazing program, yet it annoys me in several ways. I can never get the clouds to look right (look at the images I have posted), I can never get the water to be good, and I can not sculpt worth well. I will spend hours sitting there just trying to get the slope down to the water right, getting the clouds right, and getting the terrain to look like it has grass/mud/rock/moss/peat on it. This is a huge problem for me, and this alone surprises me. After all, I am a very lazy person; I will do my homework sloppily and at the last moment, I can not write neatly, and I do not have a clear workspace (ask anybody who has ever seen my room). How is it then that I care so much about these images?

I have noticed that most people I would label as carefree actually are perfectionists. They want certain things to be perfect, and then everything else they deem to be unimportant. That is how we are able to justify our selective perfectionism. Well, it turns out that I seem to be a perfectionist. It is funny how perfectionism crops out off of nowhere, something that would not seem inherent in my personality, and something that is not obvious to most people. This is what really annoys me, when people have hidden personality traits.

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Hajile said...

Out of curiosity, what are you classified as on the Enneagram chart?

Barga said...

just took it and it was far off from me, granted, I tied with 13+ in both the reserved and outgoing areas... I screw up tests often


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